


Stay With Me

by CrystalViolet



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Fluff and Smut, HP: EWE, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-07 13:09:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10361208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalViolet/pseuds/CrystalViolet
Summary: After an argument leaves him running away before the full moon rises, Remus realizes that she is the only thing good in his life.





	

**Author's Note:**

> All canon character, plots, and situations from the Harry Potter series belong to JK Rowling. I am not profiting from this work.

Steady rain had begun to pour as the sun started to peak over the horizon, the rays of light struggling to pierce through the dense cloud cover that had moved in overnight. He woke up slowly, the pain of the previous night radiating through his body, grateful for the coolness of the rain that eased his aching muscles and washed away the dirt and blood. He opened his eyes slowly, blinking away the blurriness that seemed to get worse each passing month, as he tried to take in his surroundings. He couldn’t remember where he was. All he could see was a thick canopy of leaves protecting his body from the deluge of rain that fell from the dark grey clouds above. He sat up, gingerly, trying to remember what had happened the night before. Trying to remember what he had been doing prior to the rising of the moon. Snippets raced through his head of an argument. Memories of tears flowing swiftly from whiskey colored eyes, the touch of skin against his arm as he walked away, closing the door behind him as he tried to put as much distance between them as possible. He had wanted to protect her. She had wanted to go with him.

Remus groaned as he sat up, taking stock of his injuries and his lack of clothing. He ran his hands down his face, trying to push away the grogginess that accompanied the morning after a full moon as he gathered his courage to try and stand up. He may still be young per wizarding standards, but he ached more and more with each passing year. He stood with a sigh, silently grateful that he wasn’t in the middle of a populated area. He had been stupid, walking away from the zone that had been his refuge over the last several full moons. He had stepped outside his wards and it was only by the grace of whatever higher power existed that he had retained enough of his memory to know that the Wolfsbane potion she had brewed for him had done its job. He had been relatively passive. He glanced around the area as he moved to his feet, silently rejoicing as his eyes fell upon the remnants of his clothes, scattered around him.

He stepped cautiously through the overgrowth that surrounded him, slowly pulling on his tattered and torn clothing, trying to figure out where he should go, as memories of his most recent argument with Hermione formed more completely. His heart ached, knowing that he was the cause of all their sorrow recently. He was such a broken man. He didn’t deserve her and he certainly couldn’t figure out how to make sense of his feelings for her. She deserved so much better. Tonks and Teddy had deserved so much better. They had all deserved so much more than a shattered man.

 _Half-man_ , he thought bitterly.

He had drug everyone in his life down. He would drag her down just as he had his parents, Tonks, and Teddy. Yet, he knew what she would say. He knew that she would give him a glare that would bring even Molly Weasley to her knees if he mentioned that she was worthy of so much more. She had done it once before when he had pushed away Tonks. She would do it again. And she was right. He was self-depreciating to a fault. She had done nothing more than surprise him with the fact that she had become an animagus. For him. To be with him. To help protect him. And he had shoved it back in her face and walked out the door. The truth was that he was scared that he would hurt her. Scared that she would see what he was and she would run away.

Taking a deep breath, he paused before he disapparated. He knew he should head towards home. He knew that he needed to be completely honest with her, but more than that, he needed to be completely honest with himself.

* * *

Hermione walked through the small cottage, her bare feet quiet on the wooden floors, candles lighting wordlessly as she passed by them. Moving into the kitchen, she opened the windows to the sounds of the rain outside, before moving to put a kettle of water on the stove. She could easily make the tea with a simple spell, but she found the Muggle process to be calming. And she needed something calming; her heart beating against her chest as she waited for Remus to return. Waiting for the water to boil, she walked towards the fireplace, the flames roaring to life with a slight wave of her hand, the heat penetrating the cool breeze from the open windows, washing over her body like a tender kiss. She closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath, struggling against the tears that threatened to spill over.

They had found each other in the darkest of times, each struggling to find their way after the war had ended. People said that time healed all wounds and yet each of them carried a burden upon their backs that struggled to consume them whole. He the half-breed who found himself as lost and as destitute as he had been after the first war; lost in the pain of the deaths of his wife and child at the hands of Bellatrix Lestrange. She, the child soldier without a sense of direction in the world, having had her childhood ripped from her at the hands of so many people that had used Harry, Ron, and herself without a thought as to what they would become when everything ended. Surprisingly, Harry and Ron had landed on their feet, she had stumbled.

She jumped slightly as the kettle began to whistle, ripping her from her thoughts momentarily. She poured herself a cup, watching as the color of the tea seeped into the water, before sitting in the window seat in the kitchen. She leaned her head against the cool glass, her eyes watching the rain drops meander their path along the smooth surface before disappearing out of her line of sight. She had only wanted to help him. She had only wanted to do what Sirius, James, and even Peter had done as children. And he had run away, shutting the door, and building a wall between them in the process.

She closed her eyes, struggling to keep the tears at bay, her thoughts straying to when she had run into Remus almost a year ago; a single moment that had changed her life in mere seconds.

* * *

_She believed that their meeting was serendipitous, a moment of pure and fortunate happenstance. She had gone into Muggle London, hoping to get away from the burden of her life, to just be someone other than Hermione Granger, if even for just one moment. To go somewhere where she wasn’t known. Where she wasn’t part of the “Golden Trio.” Where she could be who she wanted to be, not who people expected her to be. She had found herself in a club, the lights and music pulsing through her bloodstream and dancing upon her skin, without a care in the world. She didn’t need to speak to anyone, she didn’t need to be with anyone, she just needed to feel something; to get lost in nothing more than the music and herself._

_The room had seemed to move as one, bodies pressed against one another as they moved like a wave in the ocean, rising and falling with the undulation of the music. She hadn’t thought twice when arms wrapped around her waist from behind, a body pressing close to her own. She felt high, she felt breathless, but mostly she felt unrestricted and she grasped onto the feeling, never wanting to let go. She was drunk on the passion of the room and she had never felt as free._

_One of the hands moved from her waist, fingers following a path along her skin before pushing her hair to the side, exposing her neck. Ragged breath washed across her skin, causing goose bumps to breakout as it cooled the sweat that coated her body. She moaned softly as warm lips pressed against the sensitive skin where her neck and shoulder met. She tilted her head back, her eyes closing as she offered up more, desperate for their continued touch. For a moment, she wanted to laugh. No one would expect this from her. Hell, she didn’t even recognize herself for a moment. All she knew was that she didn’t want the feeling to stop. The lips continued their journey up her neck, leaving a trail of light bites along their path and an ache that radiated throughout her body to her core._

_They moved slowly against one another, his hands exploring her body, grazing softly over her skin until she could take no more. Each touch was teasing, fingers grazing over her breasts, her nipples forming tight peaks against the fabric of her shirt. Fingers that teased under the hem of her shirt, sliding against her slick skin, sending a pulsing need to her center. She was thankful for the fact she had worn panties; without them her desire would surely be leaving a trail down her thighs. She needed more from whomever was behind her. She could just imagine the feeling of the rough fingertips brushing against her clit, how the hardness she could feel pressed against her lower back would feel deep inside of her. She turned in his arms, her eyes opening as she found herself staring into the eyes of Remus Lupin. She had almost laughed at the absurdity of it all, until she saw the hunger in his eyes. His hands came up to cup her face, his fingers delving into her hair as he tilted her head back further. Her eyes fluttered closed at the feeling of his nails scratching against her scalp, and she felt as if she would explode from the heat radiating between them when his lips lightly touched hers before he nipped her lower lip. She had opened her mouth to him, caught up in the intoxication of his taste. Her arms wrapped around his neck as she pulled him closer to her, bodies pressed solidly against one another. His fingers tightened in her hair as he devoured her lips with his own, his tongue seeking out every crevice of her mouth. He was a man possessed, and any thought of caution quickly disappeared, her brain only able to focus on the feelings he was eliciting from her._

_His mouth left hers briefly, as her hand slid under his shirt, her nails lightly scratching a trail down his chest and stomach. Her fingers dipped under the waistband of his jeans, desperate to feel him, not caring that they were in a crowded room. He sucked in a deep breath, his eyes closing as her hand wrapped around him, rubbing against him as much as the confines of their position would allow. He breathed heavily, cursing as he pulled away, his eyes searching hers for a moment. He seemed to contemplate his next move for what seemed like an eternity, before grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the exit._

_They had made it to the alley next to the club before he pushed her against the brick wall, his mouth descending upon hers again, a moan escaping his mouth as she nipped his bottom lip before soothing it with her tongue. She couldn’t remember if she had whispered his name or if her own had escaped his lips. All she knew was that she needed him. Remus had lifted her, his hands pushing up her skirt, as she wrapped her legs around his waist. His hands cupped her ass, pulling her tight against him and she had sworn she would come at just this basic contact, his fingers brushing against whatever he could reach, while supporting her weight. She had disapparated them into her bedroom, only pulling away from him to pull his shirt over his head and to push him back towards the mattress. She had divested them of clothing with a silently cast spell, her eyes roving over his body lustfully._

* * *

She could remember the heat of his skin against hers and the mind-blowing feeling as she had lowered herself over him, taking him inside of her. She could almost feel him and she leaned her head back, her mouth opening as she began to feel her body respond to the memory. She basked in the pleasure of it all for a moment, allowing the memory to warm her aching heart if only for a second.

“I can’t lose you,” his voice came softly from the entry way. “I know we’ve had our problems, and I know I’m to blame for a lot of those, but I can’t lose you.”

Her eyes passed over his body, taking a silent inventory of his injuries. He had pulled on a new pair of jeans that hung loosely on his hips, and she felt herself involuntarily begin to salivate.

“I will beg, if that’s what you want,” he said walking towards her. “I would crawl on my hands and knees through fire if it would make you happy.”

“Remus,” she said, softly, “you know that’s never something I would want.” She stood and walked to the sink to deposit her cup, placing her hands on the counter and bowing her head.

She felt him before he touched her, his body radiating magic as it reached out to wrap itself around her own. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her body flush against his. And it was within that moment she could feel his walls tumble down and his feelings rush into her body. It was borderline overwhelming. She could barely breathe as she felt his despair over their most recent argument.

“I need you to stay,” he whispered into her hair, his hands pressing her, indicating he wanted her to turn around. She turned and gazed up into his eyes, and her breath caught at the anguish in his stare. “I can’t do this without you. I can’t breathe if I think about you leaving. Knowing that it was my fault would kill me.” His hands traced up the sides of her neck before weaving into her tangled curls. He leaned into her, pausing for a moment as if asking permission, before his lips touched hers with all the tenderness he could offer.

He pulled away slightly, lips scarcely touching, his gaze meeting hers, “I love you Hermione, I’m sorry I haven’t said it before now. I have lost everything more times than I can count. I can’t lose you too. I need you to stay. I don’t want to think of what life would be like without you.”

She ran her hands up his arms, grasping his hands in her own, slowing pulling them down their sides, fingers grasping his tightly. He watched her, desperation evident in his gaze. She knew that it took a lot for him to admit that he loved her. She had known, of course, but it was different hearing him say it aloud. She looked him over, taking in the blood that had dried against his pale skin, flaking in the hair of his beard. She didn’t know how to respond to him. To simply say she loved him too, would be almost too simple. It could never contain the level of love she held for him. And yet, with all of her love of language, she couldn’t come up with something better than to say she loved him too.

Remus watched her, knowing that she was caught in her thoughts, his heart beating against his chest and his breath caught in his throat. He tried to stamp down the fear that was rapidly running through his body. How could he have been so stupid? Why would a girl as clever, beautiful, and pure of heart, want anything to do with him? Not only was he a werewolf, he was 20 years her senior and he had nothing to his name. He started to pull his hands away from hers, to try and save them both some dignity and walk away. He stopped trying to pull away when her heated gaze reached his again.

“What are you doing?” she asked quietly, her forehead wrinkling in a frown.

“Hermione…” he paused, trying to swallow, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make this difficult, I know I can’t offer you…”

“Oh shut up, you stupid man,” Hermione cut him off, a smile playing on her lips. “You should know I love you too.” She looked up into his eyes, trying to keep her tears at bay. “I just can’t come up with the words to make you understand what I feel for you.”

Hermione cupped his cheek in her hand, her thumb running over the cheekbone gently.

“You, Remus Lupin, are the sunlight of my day and the moonlight of my nights,” she blushed a bit, saying the words to him. “I’m sorry, I know that sounds silly, but words haven’t been invented that can explain my feelings for you.”

“It’s not silly,” Remus stepped closer to her, pressing his body against hers, reveling in the feeling of her skin against his. “I would stand on the highest mountain, singing songs about love, if it would make you understand how I feel about you.”

Hermione laughed at the thought of the shy and quiet professor singing sentimental tunes of love for all the world to hear. Her heart felt as if it would burst at the thought.

“Be mine,” Remus asked her quietly, his gaze flicking between her eyes and full lips. “Say you’ll be mine for always; that you'll be my lover and mate.”

“Always,” she said with conviction, touching her lips to his delicately, “I will be yours for always, Remus.”


End file.
